Category: personal journey

How I Transformed Trauma into Strength: A Personal Story

by natkp11, posted in personal journey

I have lived a very colourful life, peppered with both good and bad scenarios. With every experience, I have learned something new, found ways to navigate difficult situations and pull through. I have built strength out of trauma and turned my life around. I am mentally strong and focused now, but that wasn’t always the case.

Five years ago I wasn’t the person I wanted to be.


“Rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life.” – J.K. Rowling


It’s funny how the above quote can seem so far from the truth when we hit rock bottom. We are dragged to the point of desperation, clinging on to the last threads of the very thing that is destroying us thinking that it is the only way forward, afraid of completely letting go in fear of landing with a huge thud and staying that way. But remaining stagnated in situations that are not good for us is far worse than actually letting go and allowing the storm to pass.

This quote became my inspiration, my motto, in a strange way. But it also gave me reassurance that I could change things.

This time five years ago, I couldn’t even see a way out of the dire situation I was in and the string of events that led me to make what felt like at the time, one of the worst decisions I had to make in my entire life. I literally hit rock bottom and couldn’t see a way out of it.
Six months I felt this way, but by the sixth month, I decided to do something about it. Too long I had allowed my life to be controlled and very often went against my intuition. This lack of trust in myself led me into an internal conflict with my soul. For what was best for my children and me. I knew I needed to make a change when at my lowest point, the thought of ending my life seemed like the only solution.

But for my children’s sake, I chose not to leave them traumatized by my own self-pity party and decided to be the change that they needed to see. To step up and be a strong role model to them.

I knew I needed to start living my life authentically and start setting good examples for my children.

It became clear that to move forward, I first needed to accept responsibility for my actions, and learn from my mistakes. I had heaps of healing to do, whilst staying present and strong for my kids. I chose not to blame those who had negatively influenced my life and forgave them. It was, after all, my decision to allow my life choices to be influenced by them.

So, with little more than a small suitcase and a backpack, my boys and I returned to the UK to build a new life. I needed to be with all my children, not just half of them.

The pandemic provided an unlikely and welcome leaning post to my healing as the pressure of immediately finding work was nulled thanks to the lockdowns. I chose to use this time to focus on my children during the day and my wellbeing at night.

I started practicing yoga again and exercise in the form of nature and beach walks were the highlight of our days. Making macramé bracelets and playing my guitar regularly, writing songs. It was a time of growth, healing, nurture and learning.


Today I feel content. Today I feel nurtured. Today I feel happy. I’m in love with life and enjoy each new day and the adventures it brings. In the last five years I have achieved far more than I ever though possible! I am fully present for my children but find balance by being able to nourish my soul with the things that are in tune with who I am.

I am becoming the person I always wanted to be, living my truth. No longer a watered-down version hiding behind the main character in the shadows, hidden from the world. I live my life full of smiles and kindness. I don’t allow negativity to penetrate my soul. I acknowledge it and look for ways to overcome obstacles. I am a fighter who fights with peaceful means.

I can freely help others the way I want to without being told that I shouldn’t. I speak my mind and stand strong to my beliefs, without forcing my views on others or making them feel bad for having differing opinions to mine. I feel I have gained a new sense of strength and independence.

I don’t claim to be perfect and know that life is one big journey of self-discovery and finding ways to improve. I have learned to embrace my differences and no longer care about the judgment of others.

In amongst all these positive emotions, the odd anxiety or stress-induced emotions have surfaced but on a scale of 10, they have been a 1 or 2. I developed the tools to be able to navigate out of holes with ease, rather than a shovel that could only dig down.

When we allow our feelings to get the better of us it can wear us down, creating a darkness that overshadows even the happy moments in our lives. It penetrates so deep filling any space and stifling the growth of happiness.

Letting go allows us to live as authentically as we can, to analyze and learn. To live in a way that we want to without harming others. I am fully embracing who I am becoming and my heart and soul are starting to feel complete.

Learning to let go has been a huge help in reducing the suffering from negative feelings. The shackles are off and my soul is free. I am becoming a person who trusts her intuition, who lives authentically, and believes in the magic of our world. No longer afraid or indecisive and aiming to be mindful in all I do. I have been dedicated to improving my emotional intelligence and living more authentically.

I have always loved helping others and this personal growth became the foundation of my passion for helping others achieve their own life goals.

As an employment coach, I supported individuals transitioning back into work after the pandemic, delivering workshops on mental health, well-being, and managing anxiety during life’s changes.

Now, I offer personalized life coaching services that are designed to help you make lasting changes in your life.

I’m here to help you get organized, stay motivated, and plan for the lifestyle you deserve.

Together, we’ll develop practical strategies and personalized steps to implement meaningful changes and improve your mental well-being. Whether you seek guidance on personal growth or support through life’s challenges, I’m here for you.

If you’re ready to make a positive change, I’d love to hear from you! Simply reach out via message on Instagram or click the button below, and let’s start this journey together.

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Diving in Head First: How I Quit Smoking After 32 Years

by natkp11, posted in Fitness, personal journey, Uncategorized

January 14th, 2024—It started like any other day but ended as the day that would change my life. I had just finished reading The Easy Way to Stop Smoking by Allen Carr. Yes, that book. I had been clinging to it like it was some kind of holy scripture. I smoked my last cigarette, went to bed, and told myself, “This is it.” And for the millionth time, I thought: “Tomorrow will be different.”

Well, spoiler alert: it was.

I woke up determined. I was a woman who had finally had enough of stinking like an ashtray. I was tired of hacking up a lung every morning. I could no longer convince myself that I was still young enough to be invincible. Nope. Not anymore. That morning, I made the decision to stick through the withdrawals. And trust me, it wasn’t pretty. There were moments when I felt like I was fighting a dragon in my head but it wasn’t so much the habit.

I had already made up my mind that my smoking had been habitual, and I was fully prepared to give up the habit. It wasn’t too bad reminding myself that the cravings were just the nicotine screaming to be topped up in my body.

The hard part was going through the withdrawals. When we smoke, we make a trillion excuses as to why we can’t quit. But what it comes down to is that little poison named nicotine is what makes us feel that way. I think the book helped me garner a good understanding on nicotine addiction. This is what shaped my mindset when I gave up. I understood it wasn’t going to be easy. I had the shakes, I was sweating. If people hadn’t been aware that I was quitting smoking they probably would have assumed I was addicted to far worse substances. By day three, it had really come to a head and I felt awful. Run down, tired, just well… meh. But I stayed strong and really pushed through. My immune system took a battering but it really was worth it.

The real magic happened the following week. That was the moment when I knew this was about more than just quitting smoking. I went for a sunrise walk with my eldest son—a walk that felt more like a rebirth than a stroll. The air was fresh, my lungs were screaming (but in a good way this time), and everything felt… peaceful. I was present. Like, really present. Not distracted by thoughts of when I could sneak off for a cigarette or whether I’d stashed enough for the day. Later that day I took my sons for a swim at the local pool and that is how I rekindled my passion for swimming.

The very next morning, I did something I hadn’t done in years—I got in the pool on my own, lane swimming. Yes, folks, after 32 years of smoking, this former fish decided it was time to remember how to swim. It was a disaster at first, but I kept at it. I felt rather embarrassed that I couldn’t even swim 50 meters without having to stop to get my breath back. Even more embarrassing, was that I took nearly 20 mins to recover.

After the first few swims, I decided to buy a membership to keep me motivated. I invested in a smartwatch to monitor (‘satan-o-meter’ as my partner affectionately named it) and help me keep track of how many lengths I was doing. About 3 months in and I was already seeing results. I was swimming about half a mile each time and I would make a point of swimming one mile once a month just to push it. By July I was taking a swim test to prove I could qualify as a lifeguard and by the beginning of August I had passed the NPLQ course.

Fast forward to today, and I still can’t believe it. After countless failed attempts to quit, here I am. Smoking is a thing of the past, and in its place is a whole new me. It’s as if quitting unlocked this massive treasure chest of opportunities I didn’t even know existed. Opportunities to get fit, to feel better, to live better.

It wasn’t just about quitting smoking; it was about opening doors that had stayed locked for far too long. And now? I feel myself pushing past my own limitations. Which that, in itself feels amazing.

Have you been considering quitting smoking? Have you tried to quit in the past? Or maybe you’ve been a non smoker for some time now. I’d love to hear your stories in the comments.

If you are looking for some extra support to give up, I also offer a coaching service. Fill in the contact form to get in touch. The first consultation is free of charge and no obligation.